G is for Grammy's Gravestone

The couple whose portrait presides over this blog will be perpetually in their twenties as they oversee the articles I write here at 100 Years in America. This photograph, however, shows only one fleeting moment out of many moments, many days, many months and many years of their togetherness. Our gentlemen (Ferencz Ujlaki) lived to be sixty years old. Our sweet young woman went on to live to the ripe old age of 97.

I have done my best to share the stories of her life here at 100 Years in America. Born Ilona Bence in Legrad, Croatia (then part of Hungary) in 1884, she married Ferencz Ujlaki in 1905. Their move to America brought many changes, including some changes to their names. He became Frank, she became Helen, and their surname went from Ujlaki to Ujlaky and then finally to Ulaky in later generations.

By the time she passed away, our blog's patroness was the clear matriarch of the family. She had no peers in the family - she was mother, grandmother and great-grandmother - and everyone referred to her as Grammy Ulaky.

Still I couldn't help being surprised when I first visited the Ujlaky family cemetery plot and I read the inscriptions on the gravestone. There they were: Ethel, Frank Jr., Frank and.... Grammy. Ilona had changed her name to Helen in America, but by the time she passed away at age 97, she was no longer known by any other first name besides the endearing "Grammy". Since I am a genealogist, I was incredulous at my first sudden realization that her identifying first name was not on her gravestone. Then I realized that it was only fitting that the loved ones who knew her by the name Grammy would choose to place that sweet name at her final resting place.

The Ujlaky family gravestone is not only missing Grammy's first name (Helen),
but Ethel's birth year in incorrect. She was born in 1920.

E is for "dear sister Ethel": 1920-1943

She was the youngest daughter of Frank and Helen Ujlaky. A beautiful baby girl, she was baptized Etelka on March 21, 1920 at the age of one month. A first generation American born of parents who had emigrated from Hungary, she came to be known as Ethel. Two years later Ethel's younger brother Kasmir was born into the family: the last of the six Ujlaky siblings.

Ethel Ujlaky (age one) with her sister Mitzi
riding Buster the horse.
Staten Island, circa 1921.

The Ujlaky family of South Beach,
Staten Island, New York, circa 1926.
Ethel is the young girl standing
at left of her mother (seated).

Born between their two brothers in this closeknit family, the four sisters, who entered the family within the span of a decade, developed a special sisterly bond that grew throughout the years.

Here they are together in 1936 outside the family's South Beach, Staten Island home. Ethel, third from the left, is sixteen years old. Her sisters, all in their twenties, were making their way into adulthood, getting married and having children of their own.

The Ujlaky sisters, circa 1936.
Ethel is the third from left.

Sadly, when Ethel reached her twenties, tragedy struck. Suffering from tuberculosis, she was admitted to Sea View Hospital on Staten Island. Ethel died in 1943, about a month shy of her twenty-third birthday.

Knowing the love that her sisters share, I was deeply touched when I learned the story of their beloved younger sister Ethel. They, her brothers, and her parents suffered a deep loss when she left them at such an early age.

At the time of her death a friend of the Ujlaky family wrote a beautiful poetic tribute to Ethel. I treasure the handwritten copy of Ida's poem that I have in my possession. It is a glimpse into the life of a dear family member whom I never had the chance to know. Here is Ida's tribute to her young friend:

To Ethel

You were so lovely, with your figure so slim,
Always, you were smiling, and you would never give in;
Though your pain was severe, still you never lamented
You put on a good front and appeared contented,
We know you had the courage, and tried very hard to win,
But your strength gave out, in your valiant fight
And you just had to leave your kin.
You have gone to rest to eternal peace and may God bless you
For a brave soldier, you were both stouthearted and true;
Your spirit is here although you’re gone
And the memory of you Ethel will live on and on.

~ Written in 1943 by Ida, friend of the Ujlaky family

Rest in peace, "dear sister Ethel".

For more on Ethel Ujlaky's story, including a picture of her bronzed baby shoe, see The footprint of little Ethel.

For more about the Ujlaky family's home on South Beach, Staten Island, see "The Waves' Rippling Song": South Beach, Staten Island.

Sources of images:

Ujlaky sisters with Buster the horse, Staten Island, New York. Sepia photographic print. Circa 1921. Privately held by Lisa, [address for private use]. 2009.

Ujlaky family, Staten Island, New York. Sepia photographic print. Circa 1926. Privately held by Lisa, [address for private use]. 2009.

Ujlaky sisters, Staten Island, New York. Sepia photographic print. Circa 1936. Privately held by Lisa, [address for private use]. 2009.

This article was originally published here at 100 Years in America in 2009. I've reposted it as part of the Family History Through the Alphabet Challenge.  Follow me here at 100 Years in America as I try to keep up with the challenge to work through the alphabet while writing my family history. I'm way behind getting started, but here goes!

"The waves' rippling song": South Beach, Staten Island

This article originally appeared here at 100 Years in America on June 1, 2008. I've reposted it here in honor of Geography Awareness Week. It is also one of my favorite contributions to the Carnival of Genealogy, whose participants (including myself) have been reminiscing this week.

The move to Staten Island's South Beach in 1921 must have felt a little bit like going home to Frank and Helen Ujlaky. Emigrating from Hungary more than twelve years earlier, they had settled in the Hungarian district of Manhattan, a bustling, busy, crowded part of the city. It was a far cry from their rural home village of Legrad, where the Drava and Mura Rivers flowed past family farms and vineyards.

In 1921, Frank resettled his family across the bay to Staten Island's South Beach. (On the 1941 map below, you can find South Beach just under the easternmost point of Staten Island.)

Frank built his family's new home on Nugent Avenue, putting up the frame and doing much of the work himself.

The house still stands today.

At the time of their move to South Beach in 1921, the children of the Ujlaky family included five siblings. The youngest, a baby brother, would be born into the family later that year. Kas was the first of Helen's children to be born in a hospital. (Helen told her grown daughters years later that she much prefered birthing her babies at home.)

After the family's move to South Beach, Frank's work continued in Manhattan. For many years his long work days included ferry rides across the bay and then an additional part of the commute to Upper Manhattan. According to one of his daughters he once fell asleep on his way home after a long day's work and missed his opportunity to get off the ferry!

Life on Staten Island was good for the Ujlaky family in the decade prior to the Great Depression. They had a new home, Frank had steady work, and the children were growing up. Before the move from Manhattan, Frank had received his Certificate of Naturalization. He (and his wife by default) were officially United States citizens.

In the 1920s, South Beach was still a fairly rural area, although Staten Island had been incorporated into New York City in 1898 along with the other three outlying boroughs of the Bronx, Queens and Brooklyn. (Staten Island was officially the Borough of Richmond until its name was changed to the Borough of Staten Island in 1975.)

The Ujlaky family owned a horse at one point and enjoyed recreation at the nearby beach for many years, including fun at the amusement rides that dotted the island.

Here are a few photos of family and friends enjoying time at the beach a decade later in 1936.

Ethel Ujlaky, Mary Kis and Helene Ujlaky

(I'm not sure of the identity of the young woman at the left)

Ethel Ujlaky with Mary Kis

Staten Island is no longer the rural arm of New York City that it was in the early 20th-century. Much of the world that the Ujlaky children enjoyed has changed.

Construction on the famous Verrazano-Narrows Bridge began in 1959 and was completed in 1964, providing easy access to Manhattan. (Until 1981, it was the longest suspension bridge in the world.) The amusement rides that the Ujlaky children knew no longer flourish at South Beach. There is, however, a current drive to bring them back and restore South Beach to its former self as a center of family fun.

Visitors today may have difficulty visualizing Staten Island the way that Frank and Helen Ujlaky saw it when they first brought their family to live in South Beach back in 1921, or when thirty years earlier, a Staten Island native named William T. Davis wrote a poetic tribute to the island:

In Memory of Staten Island

~ William Thompson Davis, 1892

How pleasant were the green woods
and the fields where we did stray,

Where grey the thorny cactus
and the sunflower spread its ray;

Where we sat beneath the tree
and watched the quiet blue Kill

And the haze softly settling
o'er the distant Jersey hill;

We saw the diamonds sparkle
on the little rippling waves,

Purely did they sparkle
and brightly shone their rays.

I see then now they glitter
though the warm sunshine is gone,

And I hear the gentle murmur -
'tis the waves' rippling song.

On the wall the ivy climbed,
so dark and so green,

And with the bending goldenrod
twined the purple bean.

We saw a chipmunk running
o'er the dead and rustling leaves,

And we heard a constant buzzing -
'twas the buzzing of the bees.

Sang a bunting low and sadly
in the old orchard tree,

He sang so faint and sadly
and his song was sweet to me.

I hear him now a-singing,
though warm sunshine is gone,

And I hear that gentle murmur -
'tis the waves' rippling song.

For more on Staten Island, see The New York Public Library's Staten Island Bibliography 1821-2004.

You might also enjoy viewing the New York Public Library's Digital Image Gallery collection of South Beach, Staten Island postcard images. Included are some great images of local landmarks and fashionable "bathing costumes" of days gone by.

Sources of images:

• Staten Island map, circa 1941, from Rootsweb's A Brief History of Richmond County, Staten Island
• Photos of Nugent Avenue home and Ujlaky family and friends in possession of the author

Other sources:

• "In Memory of Staten Island" from Days Afield on Staten Island by William Thompson Davis, 1892, 3rd printing 1937, reprinted 1994 by Staten Island Institute of Arts & Sciences

Beloved baby sister: A tribute to Ethel, 1920-1943

She was the youngest daughter of Frank and Helen Ujlaky. A beautiful baby girl, she was baptized Etelka on March 21, 1920 at the age of one month. A first generation American born of parents who had emigrated from Hungary, she came to be known as Ethel. Two years later Ethel's younger brother Kasmir was born into the family: the last of the six Ujlaky siblings.

Ethel Ujlaky (age one) with her sister Mitzi
riding Buster the horse.
Staten Island, circa 1921.

The Ujlaky family of South Beach,
Staten Island, New York, circa 1926.
Ethel is the young girl standing
at left of her mother (seated).

Born between their two brothers in this closeknit family, the four sisters, who entered the family within the span of a decade, developed a special sisterly bond that grew throughout the years.
Here they are together in 1936 outside the family's South Beach, Staten Island home. Ethel, third from the left, is sixteen years old. Her sisters, all in their twenties, were making their way into adulthood, getting married and having children of their own.

The Ujlaky sisters, circa 1936.
Ethel is the third from left.

Sadly, when Ethel reached her twenties, tragedy struck. Suffering from tuberculosis, she was admitted to Sea View Hospital on Staten Island. Ethel died in 1943, about a month shy of her twenty-third birthday.

Knowing the love that her sisters share, I was deeply touched when I learned the story of their beloved younger sister Ethel. They, her brothers, and her parents suffered a deep loss when she left them at such an early age.

At the time of her death a friend of the Ujlaky family wrote a beautiful poetic tribute to Ethel. I treasure the handwritten copy of Ida's poem that I have in my possession. It is a glimpse into the life of a dear family member whom I never had the chance to know. Here is Ida's tribute to her young friend:

To Ethel

You were so lovely, with your figure so slim,
Always, you were smiling, and you would never give in;
Though your pain was severe, still you never lamented
You put on a good front and appeared contented,
We know you had the courage, and tried very hard to win,
But your strength gave out, in your valiant fight
And you just had to leave your kin.
You have gone to rest to eternal peace and may God bless you
For a brave soldier, you were both stouthearted and true;
Your spirit is here although you’re gone
And the memory of you Ethel will live on and on.

~ Written in 1943 by Ida, friend of the Ujlaky family

Rest in peace, "dear sister Ethel".

For more on Ethel Ujlaky's story, including a picture of her bronzed baby shoe, see The footprint of little Ethel.

For more about the Ujlaky family's home on South Beach, Staten Island, see "The Waves' Rippling Song": South Beach, Staten Island.

For more mystery photographs visit the 11th Edition of footnoteMaven's Smile For The Camera Carnival whose theme is "Brothers & Sisters".

Sources of images:

Ujlaky sisters with Buster the horse, Staten Island, New York. Sepia photographic print. Circa 1921. Privately held by Lisa, [address for private use]. 2009.

Ujlaky family, Staten Island, New York. Sepia photographic print. Circa 1926. Privately held by Lisa, [address for private use]. 2009.

Ujlaky sisters, Staten Island, New York. Sepia photographic print. Circa 1936. Privately held by Lisa, [address for private use]. 2009.

The footprint of little Ethel

Ethel was the youngest sister in a family of six children (only her baby brother Kas came after her). Chances are, she was mothered not only by her mother but also by her three older sisters. I can just imagine this cute little girl with her head of blond hair, dress handmade by her mother, wiggling as her mother painstakingly buttoned each button on her little leather baby bootie.

Thanks to the care of her sisters, Ethel's bronzed baby shoe, circa 1920, has survived and is part of my little family history museum. (Admission free to the public; the red carpet is rolled out in a special way for extended family in particular!)

In addition to Ethel's little bootie, I have in my collection two little hooks: tools that must have been helpful in securing the five little buttons on each bootie. Hopefully, the children never got a hold of these tools - they might be quite dangerous in the wrong hands!

Both kept with the bronze shoe for many years, one hook has no information on it, but the other indicates the store where it must have been purchased. Along the handle (pictured above on the right), it reads:

A. GREENFELD
203 AVE. A BET. 12th & 13th STS. N.Y.C.

Was this where my great-grandparents' did their shopping? I'm interested in looking further into the history of these items and New York City's A. Greenfeld just a few blocks from my family's home on E. 16th Street. After living in Manhattan since immigrating to America, they moved to Staten Island shortly after Ethel's birth.

~

To have these little pieces of Ethel's childhood in my possession is a true treasure. A beloved member of her family, Ethel was lost to us in her twenties because of a fatal illness. She remains in the hearts of her siblings and hopefully her memory will continue, thanks to family stories, beautiful photographs, and this little shoe that gives us a glimpse into her babyhood in the 1920's.

Ethel Ujlaky with one of her big sisters
riding Buster the horse
Staten Island, 1921

This story has been submitted as part of the 55th edition of the Carnival of Genealogy. The topic is "Show and Tell!". Visit Jasia's Creative Gene for more stories about family heirlooms and other special items in family collections.

"The waves' rippling song": South Beach, Staten Island

The move to Staten Island's South Beach in 1921 must have felt a little bit like going home to Frank and Helen Ujlaky. Emigrating from Hungary more than twelve years earlier, they had settled in the Hungarian district of Manhattan, a bustling, busy, crowded part of the city. It was a far cry from their rural home village of Legrad, where the Drava and Mura Rivers flowed past family farms and vineyards.

In 1921, Frank resettled his family across the bay to Staten Island's South Beach. (On the 1941 map below, you can find South Beach just under the easternmost point of Staten Island.)

Frank built his family's new home on Nugent Avenue, putting up the frame and doing much of the work himself.

The house still stands today.

At the time of their move to South Beach in 1921, the children of the Ujlaky family included five siblings. The youngest, a baby brother, would be born into the family later that year. Kas was the first of Helen's children to be born in a hospital. (Helen told her grown daughters years later that she much prefered birthing her babies at home.)

After the family's move to South Beach, Frank's work continued in Manhattan. For many years his long work days included ferry rides across the bay and then an additional part of the commute to Upper Manhattan. According to one of his daughters he once fell asleep on his way home after a long day's work and missed his opportunity to get off the ferry!

Life on Staten Island was good for the Ujlaky family in the decade prior to the Great Depression. They had a new home, Frank had steady work, and the children were growing up. Before the move from Manhattan, Frank had received his Certificate of Naturalization. He (and his wife by default) were officially United States citizens.

In the 1920s, South Beach was still a fairly rural area, although Staten Island had been incorporated into New York City in 1898 along with the other three outlying boroughs of the Bronx, Queens and Brooklyn. (Staten Island was officially the Borough of Richmond until its name was changed to the Borough of Staten Island in 1975.)

The Ujlaky family owned a horse at one point and enjoyed recreation at the nearby beach for many years, including fun at the amusement rides that dotted the island.

Here are a few photos of family and friends enjoying time at the beach a decade later in 1936.

Ethel Ujlaky, Mary Kis and Helene Ujlaky

(I'm not sure of the identity of the young woman at the left)

Ethel Ujlaky with Mary Kis

Staten Island is no longer the rural arm of New York City that it was in the early 20th-century. Much of the world that the Ujlaky children enjoyed has changed.

Construction on the famous Verrazano-Narrows Bridge began in 1959 and was completed in 1964, providing easy access to Manhattan. (Until 1981, it was the longest suspension bridge in the world.) The amusement rides that the Ujlaky children knew no longer flourish at South Beach. There is, however, a current drive to bring them back and restore South Beach to its former self as a center of family fun.

Visitors today may have difficulty visualizing Staten Island the way that Frank and Helen Ujlaky saw it when they first brought their family to live in South Beach back in 1921, or when thirty years earlier, a Staten Island native named William T. Davis wrote a poetic tribute to the island:

In Memory of Staten Island

~ William Thompson Davis, 1892

How pleasant were the green woods
and the fields where we did stray,

Where grey the thorny cactus
and the sunflower spread its ray;

Where we sat beneath the tree
and watched the quiet blue Kill

And the haze softly settling
o'er the distant Jersey hill;

We saw the diamonds sparkle
on the little rippling waves,

Purely did they sparkle
and brightly shone their rays.

I see then now they glitter
though the warm sunshine is gone,

And I hear the gentle murmur -
'tis the waves' rippling song.

On the wall the ivy climbed,
so dark and so green,

And with the bending goldenrod
twined the purple bean.

We saw a chipmunk running
o'er the dead and rustling leaves,

And we heard a constant buzzing -
'twas the buzzing of the bees.

Sang a bunting low and sadly
in the old orchard tree,

He sang so faint and sadly
and his song was sweet to me.

I hear him now a-singing,
though warm sunshine is gone,

And I hear that gentle murmur -
'tis the waves' rippling song.

For more on Staten Island, see The New York Public Library's Staten Island Bibliography 1821-2004.

You might also enjoy viewing the New York Public Library's Digital Image Gallery collection of South Beach, Staten Island postcard images. Included are some great images of local landmarks and fashionable "bathing costumes" of days gone by.

Sources of images:

• Staten Island map, circa 1941, from Rootsweb's A Brief History of Richmond County, Staten Island
• Photos of Nugent Avenue home and Ujlaky family and friends in possession of the author

Other sources:

• "In Memory of Staten Island" from Days Afield on Staten Island by William Thompson Davis, 1892, 3rd printing 1937, reprinted 1994 by Staten Island Institute of Arts & Sciences